Podcast: I'd Rather Not

WOULD YOU RATHER: Be the social media manager for a popular brand but your posts have unforeseen consequences OR be the mascot for a popular brand but you must always live as the character?

WARNING: This prompt spoils both video games. Continue at your own risk. WOULD YOU RATHER: Change the world by destroying the arbiters of fate itself leaving the future unknown OR control the world’s cognition to make everyone happy therefore removing everyone’s free will?

WOULD YOU RATHER: Fight every animal in a zoo OR teach sapient animals to fly space jets in order to save the world?

WOULD YOU RATHER: Be quarantined in a Chuck E. Cheese by yourself OR have a raccoon landlord who continues to ask for rent even though you can’t currently work?

WOULD YOU RATHER: A house where a murderer lives under the floorboards OR a beach-side home that is drastically threatened by climate change?

WOULD YOU RATHER: End racism by sending an alien to destroy New York City so that humanity has a bigger enemy that they will all be bonded against OR end fascism by bombing London’s House of Parliament and killing all of the evil politicians?

WOULD YOU RATHER: Have a best friend who forces you to let them ride your coat tails lest they reveal your deepest, darkest secret OR attempts to sabotage you at every turn and success?

WOULD YOU RATHER: Have an imaginary friend who is actually the ghost of an old Italian mobster OR be a psychotic murder clown who also has a domestic life raising four daughters?

You are tasked with defeating an evil force and saving the world, but there is a powerful enemy at play and it’s trying to turn you to the dark side WOULD YOU RATHER: Your grandfather is secretly Hitler and he is back from the dead and is trying to make you evil OR your clothing…

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WOULD YOU RATHER: Be a respected pop culture critic that can only cover media you hate OR a respected food critic that loses the ability to taste?

As another year draws to a close, the annual tradition of bringing back losing scenarios to get one more shot at victory returns. This is Oscar’s first time joining in, so of course he’s given the role of Question Master. This couldn’t possibly go poorly.

You’ve just moved to a small town, but suddenly there’s a strange series of murders afoot and you’ve been tasked with solving it. No one knows why these crimes are happening, but you’ve been allowed to have someone assist you. WOULD YOU RATHER: Be assisted by a team of plucky but inexperienced high schoolers with…

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